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Drinks

10 Filipino Alcoholic Drinks That’ll Kick Your Ass and Make You Beg for More!

10 Filipino Alcoholic Drinks That’ll Kick Your Ass and Make You Beg for More!

Introduction

Alright, you booze-loving, party-throwing, good-time-chasing sons of bitches, get ready to embark on a wild, intoxicating, and downright liver-tickling journey through the heart of the Philippines. We’re not talking about some namby-pamby sightseeing tour. Oh, hell no! We’re diving headfirst into the rich, robust, and riotous world of Filipino alcoholic drinks. From the beer-soaked streets of Manila to the rum-drenched shores of Boracay, we’re about to introduce you to the liquid legends that fuel our fiestas and make our lolas shake their heads in disapproval. So, buckle up, pour yourself a stiff one, and let’s get this damn good party started!

San Miguel Beer

Filipino Alcoholic Drinks

This ain’t just beer, it’s the goddamn lifeblood of the Philippines. San Miguel is like that one friend who’s always at every damn party, and you’re not mad about it. It’s got a whopping 95% market share, and it’s as Filipino as adobo and balut. You’ve got your Pale Pilsen and San Mig Light, both as smooth as your lolo’s pick-up lines. It’s a pale lager with a 5% alcohol content, enough to get you singing “My Humps” in the karaoke in no time.

Lambanog

Filipino Alcoholic Drinks

This is the stuff legends are made of. Lambanog is like the moonshine of the Philippines, distilled from tubâ, which is fermented coconut sap. It’s potent as hell, with an alcohol content that can reach up to 45% abv. It’s smooth like Japanese sake, but it’ll hit you like a jeepney. The fruity-flavored variety is a hit with the young ones, but don’t let that fool you, this stuff is not for the faint of heart.

Tanduay Rum

This is the rum that makes Jack Sparrow wish he was Filipino. Tanduay Rum is the world’s largest rum brand, and it’s as rich and smooth as a freshly made leche flan. It’s got a history that goes back to 1856, and it’s been making Filipinos dance the tinikling ever since. For all I know, Tanduay probably invented the dance.

Basi

This is the drink of the Ilocanos, made from sugarcane juice. It’s fermented in earthen jars, like a fine wine. It’s got a unique taste that’s as distinct as the Ilocano accent. It’s pale red in color, and it’s got a kick that’ll make you say “Ay, apo!”

Red Horse Beer

Filipino Alcoholic Drinks

This is San Miguel’s badass brother. Red Horse Beer is an extra-strong lager with a 6.9% abv. It’s got a strong flavor that’ll make you feel like you’ve been kicked by, well, a red horse. It’s a favorite among those who like their beer like they like their balut – strong and potent.

Read next: Red Horse Beer Nights: What Guys Talk About When They’re Drunk

Gin Pom Pi

This is a cocktail that’s as fun to drink as it is to say. It’s made with gin, pomegranate juice, and lime juice. It became popular in the 90s, and it’s making a comeback in gourmet kitchens. It’s like the Spice Girls of Filipino cocktails – nostalgic, fun, and a little bit spicy.

Tapuy (Fermented Rice Wine)

This is the drink of the Ifugao people, made from glutinous rice and a bunch of other stuff. It’s used for important occasions, like weddings and fiestas. It’s like the champagne of the Cordillera region, but with a lot more soul.

Read next: Cheers to That! 9 Types of Drunks We All Know and Love (or Not)

Bahalina

This is sometimes called “coconut red wine,” and it’s made from fermented coconut or nipa palm sap. It’s aged for several months to several years, and it’s got a slightly bitter taste that’ll make you pout like a tarsier. It’s popular in the Visayas region, where they know a thing or two about good booze.

Gran Matador

This is a brandy that’s as smooth as a matador’s moves. It’s one of the most popular alcoholic drinks in the Philippines, and it’s got a rich flavor that’ll make you say “Ay, caramba!” or rather, “Ay, susmaryosep!”

Bugnay Wine

This is a wine made from the fruit of the bugnay tree. It’s got a unique flavor and aroma that’ll make you feel like you’re in the middle of an Ilocos vineyard. The grape is small and round, just like your lola’s rosary beads. But don’t let that fool you, this wine packs a punch that’ll make you shout “Mabuhay!”

So there you have it, mga kaibigan. Whether you’re a hard drinker or just looking for a good time, the Philippines gotchu! From the king of beers to the moonshine of the tropics, there’s a drink for every Juan. So raise your glasses, or better yet, your shot glasses, and let’s toast to the intoxicating world of Filipino booze. And always remember to drink responsibly, you cheeky bastards!

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